Talking to women is polite interrogation. Not about what you are thinking, but about what she is thinking and what she cares about. Anything she mentions becomes a point that can explored further. The critical action on your part is to ask open ended questions. For example, if she mentions peanuts, you get the story on peanuts. You ask something like "how did you get into peanuts." It's a question that barely makes sense, but it's open to discussion. A question like "do you like roasted nuts" is not open ended and might just end with yes or no.
There are many videos on youtube (such as below) and many webpages that explain this.
Example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnFsK_Clfgo
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